Sunday, May 31, 2009

dear ________,

it hurts pretty bad, seeing you like this. there's so much pain there. there's loneliness and sadness and silent desperation, and you try so hard to make sure no one notices. but how can i ignore the lost look in your eyes? how can i pretend that the smiles are genuine when i can tell they take every little bit of energy you have left?
i want to hear your story. i want you to let me into your life, even after you've rejected me for so many years. every time you tell me you "don't like to talk about stuff like that", i can't help but feel like you've kicked me in the stomach again. i hate that feeling. i wish you would stop treating me like a stranger.
but mostly i want you to let God in. i want you to realize that this life you've been living doesn't have to be this way. that there's a God who loves you more than you can imagine...that He knows every secret and offers His grace anyway. He's a God who offers you glorious and inexpressible joy, and He's been wanting you to take it for a really long time.
you don't have to trust me. i admit it, i'm imperfect. though i would love to hear you talk about anything even somewhat significant, it really wouldn't matter cuz i can't solve your problems. as much as i want to make a difference, i WILL fail you, and i'm sure i already have. but i will never stop praying that you would trust a GOD who never fails. ever.
i love you. but Jesus loves you more.

Love, krystal.

1 comment:

  1. You can't change him...... only God can! I go through this very same pain every day with my friends and family. I guess a part of sharing in Jesus' suffering is we must also share in his grief for those who continually and stubbornly refuse him. I think it's a part of the cross we bare for him.