Monday, January 26, 2009

why, teacher, why?

is there a mysterious factory somewhere? some kind of hidden city in the middle of nowhere? just how does it happen that seemingly normal education majors somehow become incompetent teachers?
here's what i think.
it's called UNIVERSITY. (unifying non-ideal values entering real students in training yes) or something like that.
basically, every teacher is invited to attend. and they get paid to go. the more classes you take, the more often, the more money in your pocket. they have all sorts of classes and more are added everyday, so a teacher could attend throughout her career and never run out of options.
here's a list of some of the classes available.

TCH101: intro to powerpoint
the basics on how to create powerpoints with more text than is necessary for the test, but just enough to make every student stress about every word. you will also learn how to create bulleted points that are guaranteed to only make sense 40% of the time.

TCH102: intro to lecturing
an introduction to the art of useless lectures. focus on the 3 cardinal rules of public speaking: making the audience think they need to listen, using key phrases to scare non-listening audience members into thinking they missed something, and using cliff-hangers in order to ensure attendance to the next class.

TCH103: classroom fashion
how to dress for success. a teacher's guide to avoiding fashion trends. this class helps teachers stay unified in their lack of fashion savvy.

TCH 104: rhetoric
how to communicate ineffectively with students. focus on answering questions with more questions, answering specific questions vaguely, making simple ideas sound complicated, and making 20 minutes of content turn into a 2 hour class.

of course, there are some exceptions. there are some good teachers that don't waste their time here, they don't care enough about money and are basically good people. but these are few and far between. all of you good teachers out there, i applaude you. the rest of you, however, shame on you.

love, krystal.

Sunday, January 25, 2009

i want mail.

so i'm watching you've got mail with the roommates and i'm thinking to myself, why don't i have a mysterious email/pen pal? it's not as improbable as you might think. and it's not like i would plan to meet said pal and fall in love or whatever...i just think it would be super fun to be able to talk to a person whom i believe to be completely separate from the rest of my life. i mean, he COULD be a good aquaintance, even a friend, but as long as i don't know that, it's all the same. of course...we'd have to be quite compatible in our ideas and thoughts in order to not get bored with each other, etc. but i digress.
the idea i'm trying to get at is this dream of having a confidant. a person i could say anything to, and whether or not he agreed or even cared, i'd have total freedom. he wouldn't even know what i looked great is that? and he'd be able to give me advice or at least some kind of reaction that i wouldn't have to worry about but that i would look forward to.
i'm also not saying that i don't trust my friends. i really do...and i tell them tons of things. but sometimes i want a guy's perspective, and in my life, no such guy exists...yet.
i realize that my argument sounds childish. and i agree that it is. but that's what movies do to my brain. you'd think that i would have learned my lesson by now, but i guess not.

love, krystal.

Friday, January 23, 2009

bad memories

sometimes i do things that i really regret. it's a horrible feeling...looking back and recognizing that your decisions were flawed, or your attitude was crappy.
do you know what i wish i could do with those moments?...
hang them upside down from telephone poles and let ugly pigeons land on them and peck at them until they DIE.

but then i would still remember them.

love, krystal

Tuesday, January 20, 2009


it's january 2o, 2009, and i don't want to talk about the inauguration.
it's really easy to get caught up in politics. but whether you're really excited about obama, or you're worried for the future of america, it ultimately doesn't matter.
the way i see it, nothing has changed.
my God is still God of the heavens and the earth, my life still has just one purpose. to give glory to the God who saw this day and every other day before the earth was formed.
and so i say, praise God.

love, krystal.

"Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise Him, my Savior and my God." Psalm 43:5b

Thursday, January 8, 2009

love. l'amour. el amor. sevgi. liebe.

i was in lying in bed last night, and i began to think about my love languages. my thoughts were triggered by my little cousin, who, at that moment, was basically strangling me as she lay fast asleep. and it didn't bother me.
i know, people talk about love languages a lot, and i've been asked for the list as well as requested the list plenty of times, and yet i've never felt that i've been able to explain my answers. and what better place to babble than here? order of decreasing importance, here they are: (as a reminder, these are the same for guys and girls...just making sure that was clear :) )

1. physical touch
i really don't know why this is number one. all i know is that i love hugs, and that there can never be enough people on the couch.

2. quality time
i love spending extended time with people. we don't even have to be talking or anything. i just like that you would rather be in the same room with me than any other place. and vice versa.
of's always fun to do an activity cooking or exercising or watching a movie.

3. gift giving/receiving
i know it seems kind of superficial, but this language has nothing to do with money. at least not the way i interpret it. let's say you love to read, i'll get you a 50 cent bookmark with quotes or verses, etc. you know, personalized. in the same way, it really shows me that you love me if you spend time figuring out what i would like and making it/buying it. warning: i actually kinda hate expensive gifts...they tell me that you think i'm superficial. and i would never give you something expensive...i'm as poor as heck.

4. acts of service
as much as i appreciate it when you do my laundry (mom) or maybe wash my car, i don't know if i would consider it love. maybe it's because that's not the first thing i would think to do for someone that i loved. honestly, i do those things when i feel that i owe you something, and i feel the same way when you do them for me.

5. words of affirmation
i have a really hard time telling you how i feel about you. whether you're an amazing friend or maybe you have a great'd never know it if all you had to judge by were my words. i can't even tell my mom or dad that i love them...i just sit there for a couple of excruciating seconds of silence as my mind reels with the words that it won't spit out.
in the same way, words are hard for me to receive. compliments are nice, but my brain refuses to take them in. most of the time, i find them hard to believe. by all means...keep dishing them out...they're not completely unheard...i just hope that's not the only way you hope to show your love for me...cuz i won't get it.

love, krystal

Sunday, January 4, 2009

it is so.

amen. defines it as "so be it".
i always thought it was a funny word.
i guess that sounds kinda wrong...cuz it's in the bible and all.
i was at church the other day--which is awkward in itself cuz i don't really have a home church here in CA anymore and i hate feeling unknown--and the pastor was talking about the economy and politics and stuff. it was a segue or whatever, but that's not the point. so the pastor is talking about the national debt and the bailouts, etc, and he says something along the lines of "the government is addicted to spending!". okay. then, about half a second later, some man sitting behind me seems to have gotten riled up by the statement and shouts, "AMEN!"
i understand that the man used the word properly. he agreed with the statement and responded accordingly. however i feel that, of all of the things to agree with in church, government spending is not even in the top 100.
maybe it's because i myself have never responded in such a way. even when half the congregation is shouting amen, the word still feels strange in my mouth, let alone coming out of it.
in fact, here's a list of words/phrases i would rather use...

1. i agree
2. you're right
3. it is so
4. uhuh
5. true
6. yes!
7. hallelujah
8. huh, ironic
9. touche
10. clown
and basically any other 1-3 word combination.

love, krystal