please resist the urge to assume, because of the title of my post, that i doubt that God is listening to me...it was merely for the fun of quoting one of my favorite pre-teenage-hood books that i'm letting it slide :)
anyway. lots of things have been happening lately. though if you took a look at my incredibly unbusy schedule, you'd probably have trouble believing it. but lately i've been talking to God and journaling in massive amounts,which is definitely NOT a bad thing, but serves as an indication of the turmoil of my spirit and heart and mind and everything my body involves. although turmoil may not be the right word.
it feels like every minute there's an emotion or a thought or a conviction that i just have to bring to God. nothing in my life is stable. and yet, i feel a sense of peace.
i don't know where i will be a week from now, let alone a month from now, and i have thoughts that battle back and forth--wanting to appease my father, not wanting to disappoint anyone (including myself), wanting to make wise decisions, but fearing that i won't. and when i turn once again to my God, i hear Him say "I am the Lord". and who can say otherwise? not me.
today was an especially turmoil-filled day. a phone-call from my dad, another one from my mom, a chat with a friend, a discouraging internet search, and a lot of time to think about it all.
but i rest in the comfort that, first of all, God is God, and second of all, He doesn't grow tired of listening. and i continue to pray that He would do what He wants, and that i would rest in joy.
25 “I will make with them a covenant of peace and banish wild beasts from the land, so that they may dwell securely in the wilderness and sleep in the woods. 26 And I will make them and the places all around my hill a blessing, and I will send down the showers in their season; they shall be showers of blessing. 27 And the trees of the field shall yield their fruit, and the earth shall yield its increase, and they shall be secure in their land. And they shall know that I am the Lord, when I break the bars of their yoke, and deliver them from the hand of those who enslaved them. 28 They shall no more be a prey to the nations, nor shall the beasts of the land devour them. They shall dwell securely, and none shall make them afraid. 29 And I will provide for them renowned plantations so that they shall no more be consumed with hunger in the land, and no longer suffer the reproach of the nations. 30 And they shall know that I am the Lord their God with them, and that they, the house of Israel, are my people, declares the Lord God. 31 And you are my sheep, human sheep of my pasture, and I am your God, declares the Lord God.”